


Will You Be My Valentine?

by FluffyGuardian



Category: End Roll (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Friendship, Implied Crush, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-27
Updated: 2020-08-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:53:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,139
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26146699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FluffyGuardian/pseuds/FluffyGuardian
Summary: Valentine's Day rolls around and Chris drags Russell to school for the first time on that holiday in hopes to ask Gardenia to be his Valentine, leaving Russell jealous.
Relationships: Chris & Russell Seager, Chris/Russell Seager
Comments: 3
Kudos: 13





	Will You Be My Valentine?

**Author's Note:**

> It's been a while since I wrote something, but I recently got into End Roll so I thought I'd write something for it since it's an amazing game and I needed to take time off from drawing. ^ ^;
> 
> I haven't written for characters from a franchise in a while, so instead of being daring, I figured I'd start with something simple for a couple of the characters I felt were easiest for me to write for as a test!

Russell never completely grasped the concept of Valentines Day. He never had a chance to fully observe how it worked with how much he and Chris skipped school, not that he particularly cared. Russell would’ve potentially had a chance to figure things out at home, but each day was like the last back at that place; torturous. If anything, on holidays, it seemed his drunkard of a father would try to hit Russell more often and chug his beer more aggressively than normal. His mother would tend to go out on those days, more often than not with another strange man that the blond didn’t know. Russell would simply either spend his time holed up in the bathroom to avoid the wrath of his father or seek shelter at Chris’ apartment if things got too bad or if he was invited. 

Though, this Valentines day, Russell wasn’t quite sure what he was going to do in terms of plans. Normally, he always felt as though he were imposing on Chris and his mother whenever he asked to stay over. His friend’s family wasn’t financially well off and they didn’t have much. Even when he was invited, Russell couldn’t help but feel that wave of guilt wash over him every time. A third person in the run-down apartment meant he was taking up resources that they could most likely barely afford. Why should someone as worthless as him benefit from the selfless kindness that Chris and his mother showed him? There was nothing Russel could even give them in return. With all that fresh in his mind, there was no way he could ask.

Even if Russell did have the gall to timidly inquire, by the sound of things, it seemed Chris had different plans today. For the first time in a while, they were going to school on a holiday, Valentine's day, as per his taller companion’s request. Chris seemed fidgety today on their way there and he was open as to why.

“D… Do you think she’ll say yes?” The brunette gazed down to the petite blond, brown eyes wide with concern. Russell caught Chris’ movement from his peripherals, those blue irises slowly making contact with his friend’s. In truth, he wasn’t exactly paying attention to what the other was saying this entire time, trying to sort out what his situation would be after school.

“Hm…?”

“Jeez, man! Were you even paying attention to a thing I said?” Chris didn’t seem bothered. His tone was more playful than anything. The brunette was more or less used to Russell spacing out on occasion. What was on his small friend’s mind, however, was always a mystery. He always had a hard time reading Russell. He was barely ever expressive, though Chris always figured it was the result of whatever he had to deal with at home. He could only speculate, not wanting to pry too much and make things awkward or uncomfortable for Russell. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to form the assumptions Chris did whenever he saw the blond with fresh bruises.

Noticing Russell casting his eyes to the floor as they walked, Chris gave his friend’s shoulder a reassuring squeeze. The contact, it was comforting...

“I’m just kidding, Russ!” The brunette wasn’t sure if his words reached the other, but when Russell was finally able to return Chris’ gaze, he assumed they did. “I was talking about, err… Gardenia.” That didn’t come as a surprise to the smaller boy. He was well aware of Chris’ crush on her and Russell was sworn to secrecy, not that he had anyone to tell. Chris was the only one he considered a friend. “Since it’s Valentine’s day and all, I was… Y’know, gonna ask her to be my valentine...”

The most Russell knew about this day was that people exchanged cards, flowers, or chocolates in heart-shaped boxes and hug or kiss. If there was any other point to Valentines day, he had no idea. Chris didn’t have any of the materialistic stuff, not that he would’ve pointed it out. He knew how sensitive his friend was about his family’s financial position, especially when it came to discussing his wealthy crush Gardenia. Chris began to fidget nervously again from Russell’s silence, cheeks flushing a shade of scarlet.

“I guess maybe I could also ask to spend some time together after school? B-before we went home if she could! I… Don’t think she’ll say yes or if I’ll be brave enough to ask, b-but it’s worth a shot... Right?” He didn’t sound too confident, but that wasn’t new. Despite his social finesse and confidence with his other friends, Russell frequently got to see Chris’ lack of self-esteem. He never quite knew what to say in situations like these to soothe his friend’s mind. 

“... I guess so.” Russell gave a shrug, finally speaking up. “You’ll never really know if you don’t ask.” Even though his voice was incredibly monotonous and soft, Russell’s encouragement seemed to ease up Chris’ tension.

“Right… Man, you make it sound so easy!”

The silence as they walked didn’t last very long before Chris perked up, a fresh smile directed at the diminutive blond. 

“Say... You planning on asking anyone to be your Valentine?” He seemed excited as he proposed the question. Russell couldn’t say he wasn’t expecting this. Chris would often ask if there was anyone that Russell liked, but the brunette would always be met with the same answer time and time again.

“Nope.”

“Aw, c’mon, Russ! That’s no fun. There has to be someone you wanna ask!” Chris insisted. 

“You’re the only person I really talk to...” Russell had some acquaintances and associates, but Chris was the only one he truly considered a friend, the only one he hung out with willingly and who willingly hung out with him even though he wasn’t open with the other about his home life. Open about his raging feelings of jealousy and envy that was directed at people. Open about the occasional and overwhelming feelings of murderous intent that he experienced towards other people who haven’t done anything wrong to him. His parents weren’t exempted from these feelings. If Chris knew about all of that, would he still be friends with Russell…?

There must’ve been some hint of a forlorn expression on Russell’s features because the air around the taller boy seemed to change. If the blond could put a word to how Chris seemed to be looking at him, it would be ‘concerned’. The smaller boy rubbed his arm awkwardly. A part of him couldn’t stand when Chris looked at him like that. He never felt worthy of being the source of someone else’s concern, much less his kind friend’s. The brunette’s lips parted to say something, but Russell cut him off.

“It’s fine, I never minded that.” Blue irises timidly fixed onto the soft, brown eyes gazing back at them. It was hard, but the blond managed to force a small smile to drive the point home. Much to Russell’s relief, Chris backed down with a sigh.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Russell began to wonder what the point of attending class was. As the day went on, he saw other kids asking each other to be their Valentine, but never Chris. He saw his friend attempt to ask Gardenia once during the first class they had with her, but after that, his attempts ceased completely. Was anxiety getting in the way of it? While a small, selfish voice in the back of his head kept telling him that he shouldn’t care and just be glad that the brunette was faltering, he was finding himself curious as to why Chris wasn’t making more of an effort.

After Russell noticed Chris staring out the window for most of one class they had together, he was taken to the art room during their lunch hour, where his friend procured some red and pink construction paper with some decorative bits from the teacher. Of course, Chris was probably going to attempt to make a card for his crush. The tiny voice in the back of Russell’s head grew louder as it turned into raging envy. A part of him wished someone- No, Chris- cared about him enough to want to ask the blond to be his valentine… 

Yet, that was a selfish thought that the boy had no right to entertain. His friend was right to not care enough about Russell to ask, not that he recalled Chris ever mentioning that a boy could ask a boy to be someone’s Valentine. He didn’t want to kiss the brown-haired boy or anything, but… Russell found himself craving those pats on the back that Chris would occasionally give him, his taller friend’s clamping hand on his shoulder, or those half-hugs the blond would get when Chris was feeling exceptionally playful and amiable- The petite teen quickly dismissed the thought as he felt a wistful and frustrated feeling looming over him. As much as Russell would sneak glances at his friend who was diligently working on crafting a card for Gardenia under the desk, he decided to avoid Chris for the remainder of the day.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The school day finally came to a close and Russell didn’t bother waiting for Chris at the door like he normally did. With how aggressively the brunette was working on that card for Gardenia throughout their classes, there was no way he didn’t have the will to ask her when he finished. Starting down the block, Russell’s half-lidded gaze was fixed to the sidewalk, studying the cracks and imperfections in it as he passed over them. The blond was deep in his thoughts, practically drowning in them. He didn’t want to go home, but he didn’t want to go back and ask Chris if he could tag along with him and Gardenia… He could probably hang around in an alley for a few hours or just walk around the neighborhood, those were definitely more appealing options than going back to that place for now.

Spacing out and inwardly planning out the remainder of his day, Russell barely heard the familiar voice calling out to him from behind.

“...ssell! ...Russell! Hey!!” The voice became clearer as it neared, along with the sound of footsteps rushing up from behind. The blond paused, curiosity etched on his features as he peered over his shoulder and noticed Chris running after him. Winded, the brunette slowed to a halt next to his shorter companion. “H… Hell, man! Y… You didn’t wait for… Me!” Chris wheezed. Just how long was he running for? Russell just blankly gazed up at the taller boy.

“I… Thought you were going to ask Gardenia to be your Valentine and hang out after school… So I just-” He didn’t get a chance to finish before his friend interjected. 

“Y… Yeah, about that…” Drawing a deep breath, Chris slipped off his backpack, rifling through it to pull out a folder. “I-I wound up not asking her…” 

“Oh…” Russell felt a twinge of guilt as relief engulfed him.

“Hey, you’re not even gonna ask me why?” The blond must’ve looked confused because Chris started grinning, albeit sheepishly. Before Russell had a chance to inquire like his friend wanted, with slender digits, a clumsily cut paper heart adorned with lace was pulled out of the folder and presented to the smaller boy. “Ta-da! Will you, uh… Be my Valentine?”

The question hit Russell and he couldn’t help but gawk at the pink and red crafted card. The words ‘Happy Valentines day, Russell!’ were written on the front of it. All of the envy and frustration he was feeling throughout the day fed the guilt that was plaguing him. The other’s lack of a response caused Chris to awkwardly shift his weight.

“I… Uh, look, I know it might be a little weird, but I really didn’t see myself being brave enough to ask Gardenia this… S-so, I thought ‘hey, why not ask good ol’ Russell instead?’!” Chris’ voice cracked slightly and it didn’t go unnoticed. Was he scared? Russell didn’t understand why he felt his face begin to burn right now, nor why there was this violent fluttering feeling going on in his stomach. It was uncomfortable.

At a loss for words, the blond timidly accepted the card, holding it in his small hands. His blue eyes ran over the lettering over and over. What did he do? What did he say? Russell had a hard time lifting his head, this felt so surreal.

“I… Um… Sure, I guess.” His voice was small as he gave a small nod. Despite the seemingly half-hearted response, Chris seemed to relax some.

“G-good! ‘Cause, uh… I know I don’t say it much, but, ah… I do consider you a good friend.” He rubbed the back of his neck, studying the blond’s flushed features. He could never recall seeing Russell blush before. Chris tried to avoid making his friend ever feel uncomfortable, but he swore this would’ve been a nice thing to do, given the other’s statement during their walk to school. Russell didn’t have many other people he talked to or spent time with and that stuck with Chris for most of the day. He could forgo asking Gardenia to be his Valentine for this year, right? Maybe he could even start trying to get Russell closer to his other friends so the blond wouldn’t be so isolated and alone. “I-I dunno… I’m sorry if I made things awkward. I just… Wanted to do something nice for you since I appreciate ya...”

“Erm… No, you didn’t, it’s fine...” Russell mumbled. He desperately wished he was better at expressing himself. Chris and everyone else made it look so easy. “Just… I don’t… I didn’t make anything for you…”

“Psh, that’s what you’re worried about, man?” The brunette put the folder back in his backpack, forcing a good-natured scoff to lighten the mood. “Don’t worry ‘bout it!” Russell remained silent. A terrible feeling kept him oppressed. He’d spent the entire day feeling bitter, angry, and jealous of Chris and doubting him. All the while, it turned out his friend was working hard for him, and again Russell had nothing to give in return. At this point, he could’ve considered himself a black hole that just absorbed everything he was given by kind people that he didn’t deserve. 

None of his guilt reached his features, expression blank as ever when he met Chris’ gaze. While Russell’s expression was impassive, it was almost as if those deep, blue irises were pleading. Pleading for Chris to let his smaller companion know if there was anything he could do to repay the brown-eyed boy for his act of kindness. Running a hand through his short, brunette hair, Chris hummed a note in thought.

“Well… If you really wanna make it up to me, uh…” What was something simple? The taller teen’s eyes wandered for a moment before a grin graced his features. “Err… How about you give me a hug, we head over to my place, and you let me beat you at that game you let me borrow?” Chris figured it was a good way to keep Russell out of his house, even if it was only for a few hours. “Deal?” Russell had only received hugs from one person, and that was the nurse that would give him cold compresses whenever he went to the hospital after his father hit him. She was so kind and her hugs were warm. He couldn’t help but wonder if all hugs felt the same.

After a few moments of consideration, Russell nodded wordlessly. He was grateful that Chris invited him to his apartment, and since it was something he wanted in return for being nice to Russell, the blond wouldn’t have felt right insisting otherwise this time, despite his normal feelings of being a burden. He barely noticed when Chris slowly held his arms open for whenever his shorter friend was ready to accept. It felt like Russell’s body was slowly moving on its own as if it were drawn to his friend's. 

Before he knew it, he had his head tucked under Chris’ chin and was enveloped in a warmth that couldn’t compare to the nurse’s. Russell’s hands timidly moved against their will as they positioned themselves on the other’s back. The blond felt relaxed. Safe, even. Things he didn’t experience often at all. His embrace tightened slightly, much to the brunette’s surprise. Russell felt as though he were melting into his friend’s comforting arms. 

The tension in Chris’ shoulders eased up as he rested his heated cheek on Russell’s head. He was concerned about how the other would handle being hugged. He never seemed uncomfortable when Chris touched him, but he didn’t want to push boundaries when it came to the diminutive blond. Though, he was worried about how long Russell would accept the embrace. Was it getting awkward? Did he want to stay like this a while longer? Was he enjoying it? Chris was, especially since Russell was so small and cozy to hold, but… 

After a few more moments, Russel felt Chris’ hold loosen. The blond couldn’t help but inwardly feel a bit disappointed, then embarrassed about the disappointment. Regardless, he slowly pulled away, keeping his eyes pointed to his brown loafers. 

“Ah… Thanks, man! Sorry if it made ya uncomfortable. I-I won’t do it again or ask for anymore if it did.” Chris seemed worried. 

“... It didn’t.” Russell replied simply. Words burned on the tip of his tongue, mostly ones of gratitude and an invitation to do it again whenever Chris deemed it appropriate, but he just choked them back. He had no right to ask for such affection. Regardless, the brunette seemed relieved.

“Oh, good…! Heh, got worried for a sec I was asking for too much there.” Slipping his bag back on, Chris offered Russell another sheepish grin even though he wasn’t looking. “So! Ready to go back to my place so I can totally kick your ass at video games?” When he nudged the blond’s shoulder, Russell finally looked up and nodded. “Great! Let’s go, then, Valentine!”

As the two started walking back towards Chris’ apartment, Russell couldn’t help but sneak glances at the paper-crafted heart he’d received. While he still felt rueful regarding his prior resentment towards his friend, the boy couldn’t say that he wasn’t actually enjoying the day for the time being. He was convinced he still didn’t deserve this kind gesture, especially since what Chris wanted in return benefited Russell as well, but he didn’t mind spending time with his friend, especially since it meant he got some reprieve from his abusive household.

Russell found himself wondering if he and Chris would spend another Valentines day together in the future.

_He hoped so._


End file.
